Crushed!
In my head, I have had a very prolific and active love life since I was like, 12 (!)...real life, of course, is a different story... :)
From being someone who had one new crush every few months to being someone who has not liked anyone in a long time, I have come a long way...maybe it's just age or maybe my imagination has got saturated or maybe hope has now been replaced by frustration! Hell, I am even warming up to the idea of an arranged marriage and those who have known me long will realize the gravity of the situation...once they are done laughing their ass off, that is...
Anyways, this post is not about the fictional aspect of my romantic pursuits...but more a "chronological documentation" of some interesting, innocent and ultimately tragic crushes that I have had over the years...
The namesake - This was almost certainly the first crush I had...I think I was in class 7th at that time...a time when kids were kids...not the brand conscious, style obsessed mini-adults that swarm the Mocha's and the Alfredo's these days...I lived in a then-obscurish town called Bathinda (to be made famous later by DDLJ and now Jab We Met) and studied in K.V. No. 1... I was leading a blissful and serene existence till one day I noticed this class 11th guy in my school...now he was no Brad Pitt...far from it actually! He was really fair and skinny and dumb and had a reputation of being, ahem, naughty..! In fact, I have no clue why I liked him except maybe because we shared the same surname...which made the whole LLHA and FLAMES exercise very entertaining! Of course I figured that I won't even have to change my name after marriage, which was rather convenient...so I thought and thought and thought about how I could create a situation where he would notice me...and came up with this genius of an idea – he was in the habit of walking around the corridor during the recess, chatting his way to glory...I too managed to convince this friend of mine to take walks around the corridor during recess (which she found very suspicious)...I started dressing with uncharacteristic care...became very conscious of the way I looked, walked and talked (everything practiced well in front my bathroom mirror, no less) and started my mission! Whenever I crossed him I would do one of the following: a) giggle (loudly) b) announce (loudly) how I am so excited about coming to the next party at the local club c) stare at him d) all of the above…needless to say, it never even evoked a glance from His highness but hey, can’t blame me for not trying!!
The silent admirer – At some level, all girls have a thing for “silent type” of a guy…he’s elusive and mysterious and that’s maddeningly charming! But there is a difference in being silent and being SILENT! Unfortunately for me, my next crush fell into the latter category…Naveen Sharma was two years my senior when I was in 10th standard…and he was very cute looking…and I am dead certain that he too had a thing for me…our classrooms were diagonally opposite to each other and if we both sat at our respective first desk (the only time in my life I voluntarily did that) we could steal covert glances at each other all the time…and that’s exactly what we did…but that also ended up being the only thing we ever did! I dropped one hint after the other, I even managed to utter a complete sentence to him once, we ensured our routes and timings matched but he just never did anything about it…there were opportunities galore as we had some common friends but I guess the times were different…it was a small town, no one in my knowledge had a relationship (!), in fact no one even spoke about these things openly and frankly, I don’t even know what I would have done had he ever actually spoken to me! And then, yet again, my dad got transferred and I never heard about him again…
The star – He was my cousin’s cousin from the other side of the family…the first recollection I have of him is when I was 6 or 7 years old and somehow I ended up at his house where my dad was to come and pick me up…I was a painfully shy kid and was feeling quite awkward with these new people…I clearly remember I went and stood at the window waiting for my car to show up…but it was he who showed up…he was sweet enough to offer me one of his comics to read…and that kept me busy for the rest of the time…I didn’t see him again for many years after that…though his academic achievements were often referred to me as a benchmark! Anyways, I saw him again at my cousin’s wedding…by this time he was a tall, lanky, polite boy studying in DCE…as in most cases, something inexplicable happened to me and I was infatuated! It seemed so perfect…we could all hang out together…he was a smart, classy guy and I wasn’t too bad either..! Aah…in 2 days my imagination took its own sweet course…till it occurred to me that it’s impossible that a guy like this would not have a girlfriend already! So I asked my sister to find out the same…I remember we youngsters were playing a game of cards and I was totally flirting with him and suddenly my sister asked him if he was seeing someone…and yes, of course he was! Cherry on top? They had been seeing each other since school and were totally committed (they went on to marry each other)…! I think it’ll suffice to say that I was totally crushed!!
The bad boy – Well, there is always one, no? This was an interesting time for me...I was on the brink of a new phase in my life which promised many possibilities…all I had to do was clear some rounds of GDs and Interviews…never been one to ace these, I had to take help from an expert! This expert happened to be a guy who conducted his classes in IIT D, which was a haven of men (quality is of course, debatable)…anyways, during the course of 2 months I became really good friends with one of the IITians in my class…nothing spectacular about him but he was fun, exciting, mean and I had never flirted like that with any guy before that!! We would spend hours on the phone and just be silly during the class…all until the day of our last interview (we were both there)…he waited till I was done with mine and we decided to go for a movie, as we realized that there are no more classes for us to meet at…everything was going great during the movie (The Last Samurai, I remember clearly :) )…he was funny, I was giggling, we were giving each other coy smiles…and the movie wasn’t bad either! And this was the moment he decided to tell me about his girlfriend and how madly in love he was with her…thank god movie theaters are dark otherwise my crestfallen face would have given away whatever little ‘mystery’ I had left!! It was just went downhill from then on…we were ‘good friends’ for a couple of months more…I even harboured the ambitions of making him fall out of love with his girlfriend and in love with me (seriously)…but all my plans went down the drain when we ended up going to different campuses…last I heard, he was single and ready to mingle…but who was interested? Ironic!?
Mr. Right – I don’t know if it is appropriate to call him that since, you know, I never got him! But really he was just perfect…a journalist, good looking, single, intelligent…the works…he was in my office and by some stroke of luck we had a common friend…actually, we were just friendly with this person…but that’s besides the point…so, after eyeing him for many days and realizing that I had wasted many years waiting for the guys to make a move…now was the time to take matters in my hand and give cupid a rest…so I confessed to our common friend that I was interested in this guy (something which I have never done in my life...confess, that is) and asked her to do something…fortunately for me she was also very excited about this development…unfortunately for me, she was plain dumb…she started off by talking about me to that guy by mentioning what a nice girl I was and how I was interesting and where I had studied…to me she seemed like a human form of shaadi.com! Again I realized that the plan was going out of my control…so after much deliberation I decided that both of us should go out drinking and invite him too and then she’ll leave midway saying that she is getting late (yeah yeah I know I have seen too many movies)…but you know what? It worked! This guy and I spent some awesome time that night…we talked about so many things…books, movies, music…he even skipped another party that night…! Man, it was just so meant to be…next morning when we crossed each other in the office, I looked up to say hello…and boing! He just looked right through me! I thought maybe he’s having a bad day…but then the bad days became a routine…he never acknowledged me after that night! Till date I have no explanation for why it could have happened…did the booze wear off? Is it because when he asked me, I couldn’t remember the lyrics to my favourite song?! Did I make it very obvious? Well, whatever it was, it was heartbreaking (sniff) and I have been completely off making any plans ever since!! :D
From being someone who had one new crush every few months to being someone who has not liked anyone in a long time, I have come a long way...maybe it's just age or maybe my imagination has got saturated or maybe hope has now been replaced by frustration! Hell, I am even warming up to the idea of an arranged marriage and those who have known me long will realize the gravity of the situation...once they are done laughing their ass off, that is...
Anyways, this post is not about the fictional aspect of my romantic pursuits...but more a "chronological documentation" of some interesting, innocent and ultimately tragic crushes that I have had over the years...
The namesake - This was almost certainly the first crush I had...I think I was in class 7th at that time...a time when kids were kids...not the brand conscious, style obsessed mini-adults that swarm the Mocha's and the Alfredo's these days...I lived in a then-obscurish town called Bathinda (to be made famous later by DDLJ and now Jab We Met) and studied in K.V. No. 1... I was leading a blissful and serene existence till one day I noticed this class 11th guy in my school...now he was no Brad Pitt...far from it actually! He was really fair and skinny and dumb and had a reputation of being, ahem, naughty..! In fact, I have no clue why I liked him except maybe because we shared the same surname...which made the whole LLHA and FLAMES exercise very entertaining! Of course I figured that I won't even have to change my name after marriage, which was rather convenient...so I thought and thought and thought about how I could create a situation where he would notice me...and came up with this genius of an idea – he was in the habit of walking around the corridor during the recess, chatting his way to glory...I too managed to convince this friend of mine to take walks around the corridor during recess (which she found very suspicious)...I started dressing with uncharacteristic care...became very conscious of the way I looked, walked and talked (everything practiced well in front my bathroom mirror, no less) and started my mission! Whenever I crossed him I would do one of the following: a) giggle (loudly) b) announce (loudly) how I am so excited about coming to the next party at the local club c) stare at him d) all of the above…needless to say, it never even evoked a glance from His highness but hey, can’t blame me for not trying!!
The silent admirer – At some level, all girls have a thing for “silent type” of a guy…he’s elusive and mysterious and that’s maddeningly charming! But there is a difference in being silent and being SILENT! Unfortunately for me, my next crush fell into the latter category…Naveen Sharma was two years my senior when I was in 10th standard…and he was very cute looking…and I am dead certain that he too had a thing for me…our classrooms were diagonally opposite to each other and if we both sat at our respective first desk (the only time in my life I voluntarily did that) we could steal covert glances at each other all the time…and that’s exactly what we did…but that also ended up being the only thing we ever did! I dropped one hint after the other, I even managed to utter a complete sentence to him once, we ensured our routes and timings matched but he just never did anything about it…there were opportunities galore as we had some common friends but I guess the times were different…it was a small town, no one in my knowledge had a relationship (!), in fact no one even spoke about these things openly and frankly, I don’t even know what I would have done had he ever actually spoken to me! And then, yet again, my dad got transferred and I never heard about him again…
The star – He was my cousin’s cousin from the other side of the family…the first recollection I have of him is when I was 6 or 7 years old and somehow I ended up at his house where my dad was to come and pick me up…I was a painfully shy kid and was feeling quite awkward with these new people…I clearly remember I went and stood at the window waiting for my car to show up…but it was he who showed up…he was sweet enough to offer me one of his comics to read…and that kept me busy for the rest of the time…I didn’t see him again for many years after that…though his academic achievements were often referred to me as a benchmark! Anyways, I saw him again at my cousin’s wedding…by this time he was a tall, lanky, polite boy studying in DCE…as in most cases, something inexplicable happened to me and I was infatuated! It seemed so perfect…we could all hang out together…he was a smart, classy guy and I wasn’t too bad either..! Aah…in 2 days my imagination took its own sweet course…till it occurred to me that it’s impossible that a guy like this would not have a girlfriend already! So I asked my sister to find out the same…I remember we youngsters were playing a game of cards and I was totally flirting with him and suddenly my sister asked him if he was seeing someone…and yes, of course he was! Cherry on top? They had been seeing each other since school and were totally committed (they went on to marry each other)…! I think it’ll suffice to say that I was totally crushed!!
The bad boy – Well, there is always one, no? This was an interesting time for me...I was on the brink of a new phase in my life which promised many possibilities…all I had to do was clear some rounds of GDs and Interviews…never been one to ace these, I had to take help from an expert! This expert happened to be a guy who conducted his classes in IIT D, which was a haven of men (quality is of course, debatable)…anyways, during the course of 2 months I became really good friends with one of the IITians in my class…nothing spectacular about him but he was fun, exciting, mean and I had never flirted like that with any guy before that!! We would spend hours on the phone and just be silly during the class…all until the day of our last interview (we were both there)…he waited till I was done with mine and we decided to go for a movie, as we realized that there are no more classes for us to meet at…everything was going great during the movie (The Last Samurai, I remember clearly :) )…he was funny, I was giggling, we were giving each other coy smiles…and the movie wasn’t bad either! And this was the moment he decided to tell me about his girlfriend and how madly in love he was with her…thank god movie theaters are dark otherwise my crestfallen face would have given away whatever little ‘mystery’ I had left!! It was just went downhill from then on…we were ‘good friends’ for a couple of months more…I even harboured the ambitions of making him fall out of love with his girlfriend and in love with me (seriously)…but all my plans went down the drain when we ended up going to different campuses…last I heard, he was single and ready to mingle…but who was interested? Ironic!?
Mr. Right – I don’t know if it is appropriate to call him that since, you know, I never got him! But really he was just perfect…a journalist, good looking, single, intelligent…the works…he was in my office and by some stroke of luck we had a common friend…actually, we were just friendly with this person…but that’s besides the point…so, after eyeing him for many days and realizing that I had wasted many years waiting for the guys to make a move…now was the time to take matters in my hand and give cupid a rest…so I confessed to our common friend that I was interested in this guy (something which I have never done in my life...confess, that is) and asked her to do something…fortunately for me she was also very excited about this development…unfortunately for me, she was plain dumb…she started off by talking about me to that guy by mentioning what a nice girl I was and how I was interesting and where I had studied…to me she seemed like a human form of shaadi.com! Again I realized that the plan was going out of my control…so after much deliberation I decided that both of us should go out drinking and invite him too and then she’ll leave midway saying that she is getting late (yeah yeah I know I have seen too many movies)…but you know what? It worked! This guy and I spent some awesome time that night…we talked about so many things…books, movies, music…he even skipped another party that night…! Man, it was just so meant to be…next morning when we crossed each other in the office, I looked up to say hello…and boing! He just looked right through me! I thought maybe he’s having a bad day…but then the bad days became a routine…he never acknowledged me after that night! Till date I have no explanation for why it could have happened…did the booze wear off? Is it because when he asked me, I couldn’t remember the lyrics to my favourite song?! Did I make it very obvious? Well, whatever it was, it was heartbreaking (sniff) and I have been completely off making any plans ever since!! :D
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Life
1 comment:
You were right, I loved this one!
Could relate to each "kind" of crush I've had too!!
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