Thursday, December 7, 2006

Someone

Sometimes in life you come across some unexpected things that leave an ever lasting impression...it could be the playfulness of an extremely hyperactive child, 3 different hues in the sky, the piercing all knowing eyes of a stranger, a flock of birds conferencing or a song seemingly written with you in mind...

Four or maybe five years ago I had discovered blogging...or rather chanced upon a group of very interesting blogs...most of them I have forgotten, some I remember...but only one left an impact on me...it was an assortment of self written poems about love and loss...and they are some of the most beautiful pieces that I have come across till date...not because of their style or depth or poetic talent but because of the feeling with which they were written...the feelings of the writer are almost palpable...the blog was later deleted as I could never trace it again...I don't even know the gender of the writer, for he or she was called "someone" (yes, I blatantly copied that :) )...actually, if I think of it, it doesn't even matter...

Luckily, I had taken the print outs of some of those poems...I dug them out from my files and have retyped them...I have even tried to keep each comma and dot intact...I probably have no right to publish someone else's work, that too a personal and intimate one...but I am torn...I know I could have taken the credit for these and no one would find out...but I would know...so, I'll just take credit for the fact that I have it me to appreciate emotions like these...and I hope that someday I can feel love as fervent as this...

I’ve crept into your temple
I have slept upon your pew
I have dreamed of the divinity
Inside and out of you
I want it more than truth
I can taste it on my breath
I would give my life just for a little death
_______________________________________________________

“i could write a song for your lips,
or a fleeting poem for your heart
a few honest words, some awkward thoughts…
and only hope that you’ll have a clue…
i have little rhyme, but all the reason
and I will try not to burden you…
i’ll just write it down for you to memorize,
i don’t feel like giving my thoughts away…
it would be nice if you could hum in the night,
and sing it till the memory stays…”
_______________________________________________________

“it turns out that all those nights…
i was watching the same old stars shine…
and the lines I traced over them…
had no way of etching themselves in the sky…

the words that I scrawled all over
they’ll just dry out and fade away…
and I was only hoping that my song…
would do justice to your voice…

my inspiration was my treasure…
don’t know how long I could keep you in sight…
i can live with my silence, like before…
but do you really need to keep so quiet…?

felt a little lonely and tired…
so here I am, down on my knees…
i close my eyes, and catch my breath…
and hear my world fall all around me…”
_______________________________________________________

“sometimes when I close my eyes, and stay awake
not an insomniac, not yet in quietus…
amidst a few memories and moments that flood me,
stolen, dwelt, candid and precious
those petite thoughts and star gazing
a starlit roof and the world underneath...
past perfect, and future tense…
the present always seemed to inconsequential..
your dulcet voice rings clear, still vivid...
and I fell in love, that day…

then as if it was all over…
as if the stars never lit the sky..
unsaid, unasked, unanswered, yet undone…
words always felt miserably inadequate…
I knew I should not feel sorry…
I never had a chance anyways…
what I had with me, was my dappled sunshine
and all my pain, unrequited yet mine
I just held it all together,
and I thought I’d never love again

today as I stand before yesterday’s ghost…
and I read your voice from my very eyes…
I treasure every single word you write…
and find solace in the mere acceptance of my existence
for I am happy with the wisdom and the innocence,
of someone who knows nothing at all…
flowers or stars don’t matter anymore…
it doesn’t matter if you go away…
and I am all alone again…
I am still very much in love with that day”

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